What is self-integration? Journey into shadow and light

Shadow and light work

When we begin the self-healing process, many of us focus on the ‘light aspect’. In other words, we consciously put our focus to see ourselves in our most healthy and aligned version. We may use affirmations to re-train unhealthy beliefs, follow practices and diets to keep the body working at its best, etc.

This is all incredibly important for healing. Most of us need to build our body-mind resilience through many years of this, before we are ready for a “deeper” awareness expansion. What do I mean by that?

Eventually, we become ready to embrace more parts of ourselves as being valid, important, and loveable. Including the uncomfortable, the not so “high vibe” parts. 

The law of mirroring 

It doesn’t end with taking all our inner aspects as part of yourself. As the urge for a deeper connection to the universe becomes stronger, we begin to desire taking everything outside us as part of ourselves, too. The lovely, the unimaginably good, and the not so lovely that we see around us in the world.

There’s a growing recognition, through our own lived experience, that everything outside of us represents an aspect internal to us. Yes, even horrible world events and bad relationships! 😉

When we are ready to learn to embrace all parts of ourselves, the healing process becomes a balance of working with ‘shadow and light’. This is the deep healing needed for full integration of the human being. 

The resistance in our way

Whenever inner narratives and discomforts don’t go away easily, with peaceful clarity, as soon as we identify them and our desire to change, something is attaching us to them. That something is emotions.

If we go on to tell ourselves that we now are open to and believe in a new reality, when our emotional body is feeling something very different, we are gaslighting ourselves. We are numbing ourselves to the truth of that hurting part, connected to the emotion(s) we refused to listen to.

If instead we can make it safe to fully sit with it, then we can meet our fear of it. We find that we can be with it. It doesn’t actually hurt us. We can hold fear gently. If we truly, fully sit with it, fear of the emotion(s) begins to dissolve. Instead of being our enemy, the emotion becomes a friend.

Normally we look for treatments for our body from a place of fear, as if the body is our enemy. Unconsciously we do the same with unwanted emotions and thoughts. We want to be ‘fixed’; rescued from ourselves. I approach healing differently: allowing everything to be embraced as it is. This allows the blockages from suppressed trauma to come to light and be released.


I work to fully integrate all the parts that are hurting by giving a safe space for every emotion no matter how painful, terrifying or shameful. Only when it can be fully seen and held without pressure, can it be released from their hiding place in the unconscious.

This safe space of unconditional presence ensures a full integration of all the parts of your being, so that you may approach a sense of unity within without suppressing the painful parts of yourself. The pain – both physical, emotional and mental, is thus allowed to transform, losing its energetic hold over you. All the energy you’ve spent suppressing it will be released. This will help you to feel lighter, less anxious, more free and having more energy.

Please remember that the healing is non-linear. Every act you take in the direction of self-integration is an expression of self-love. And they do accumulate (on that, you’ll just have to trust me). However, once you heal one layer of your being, a deeper one may unfold. This is the human journey. Rest assured that every time you truly release a layer, it gets easier to be present with yourself even when you’re working with the next deeper one. The more self-acceptance you develop this way, the easier it gets.


Read more:

Book a self-integration session

How the Completion Process works

Self-integration mentoring – how I work

My energy healing journey and guiding principles

The Completion Process website